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The cathartic nature of delicate swears…

When new people come to my page and look over the shop and especially the gallery, they will see cute flowers, spooky cobwebs, knitted cosyness, and lots and lots of yarn. But they also see…the swearings. What I like to call, “The Delicate Swears”.  They’re often tiny, but not always; sometimes they fill a large frame with flowers and sweetness and a big fat “What the Fuck” in the center.  They can be a little jarring if you’re not expecting them. I’ve gotten a little criticism here and there about “Do you really have to make these vulgar things, Madam?” My answer, is, “Oh yes. I most certainly do. I will make twice as many of them now, and you can see yourself out. Asshole…”

It all started innocently enough. When the Pandemic started,  I had just begun playing around with embroidery. I was admiring so many beautiful things in frames that other people had done. Whimsical things, picture perfect things, shimmering translucent things…and saucy, saucy things. I knew in the abstract that embroidery had come a very long way indeed, but I was delighted by all of it. And then I tried my hand at a few myself. Small things. Tiny frames full of little flowers, with something extra expressive in the middle. Large, swooping lines of beautiful vines, with “This is Bullshit” or “Fuck This Shit” in the middle. Roses, lavender, clover, tansy, all with something scathing in there somewhere.  And my friends kept asking for more, and more…

Why is it so satisfying to have a good, sweary embroidery? Why is it so satisfying to make them? Because it is, it really is. Every time I make something with a lot of cussedness in it, I’m delighted with myself. And honestly, it’s cathartic as hell to stab something ear-searing into some linen. It’s been such a long, hard year, and people are so very, very, burned out, frustrated and just over all of it. And yet, it still goes, chugging along. The Pandemic, the unrest, the weather, trying to have a normal life in the face of the most un-normal year we’ve had in our lifetimes. It’s sometimes nice to have a small piece of something pretty that agrees with your frustration, that validates it. That little circle with “Goddammit All Anyway” is now your very bestest friend.

Also…we’re home more. So very, very, very much more. We’ve been looking at the walls of wherever we’re living for a very long time indeed. Here in The House of Maus, we’re both high risk for bad Covid outcomes, so we’ve been living a lockdown kind of life since last March. There’s been bouts of decorating mayhem here and there, to have something new to see every day. I remember when I was a museum guard, that feeling when somebody brought in a new piece of art to display. It was like your birthday; something new to see and appreciate! Something you haven’t already been staring at for months and months! And loads of people have wanted something new to see, something pretty and crassly cheerful. I know I have.

And I think the best part is, people want something made for them by somebody they like. Something that the megasites online can’t give them, something that isn’t a prefab piece of plastic that gets the heave-ho once it stops being fun anymore. It’s more comforting to know that maybe somebody was thinking of you, personally, when they were stabbing in that “Try Not To Murder Anyone Today”embroidery.  That embroidery knows you.  How you’re feeling. What you need to hear to get through the day. How much swearing you secretly do during a Zoom meeting. That embroidery gets you.

It’s really hard for me to keep the swears in the shop, they tend to fly out the door pretty quickly. But I feel like I need to keep up the stabbing. We all still have a long, hard road ahead of us, and only a pocketful of really good swears will get us out of our personal funks for a while. I promise, I will do my part…

 

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Winter Delights…

Hello, my dears! I know, it’s been a little while since I posted anything here. Mostly I was enjoying a quiet break here at Chez Cohen with my sweet fellow, my sweet cats, and my growing pile of things to make. I’ve been kept very busy with little projects (and big projects) of all kinds, and I’m absurdly gratified by all the kind friendship and out-and-enthusiam when I present something new. Because of all of these people, I’ve been able to not just bring in a little money but also to keep my spirits up. December was rough for everybody this year. It was cold and dark, lonely and seemingly never-ending. We were away from our friends and family and loved ones, and trying like hell not to get sick. More and more of us have lost friends or family or colleagues to Covid, and we’re all still attempting to navigate this world now so full of obstacles.  So the things that have been getting us all through are sometimes small, quiet moments of fun…

What counts as those moments for me? Well, there are the usual bits. I have new paints to try out and appreciate and make a mess with. The cupboard is well stocked with tea from Society du The’ and Mrs Kelly’s Tea. I’ve been trying to read to Matt before bed, since it helps us both wind down and sleep. (The book at the moment? “Sense and Sensibility and Seamonsters”. ) Besides scouring Netflix for distractions, I’ve also been avidly hunting down Youtube channels and stumbling onto wonderful, rare gems worth sharing. Pinsent Tailoring, Dominic Noble, Rachel Maksy, Cathy Hay and the Banner siblings (Bernadette and Dani banner) have really made my days brighter, and taught me so much. Cinema Therapy is a great Youtube series, walking us through all kinds of relationship woes using movies. When I need a lift, I go play something from Gunship’s youtube channel, and their videos are an 80’s nostalgia joy. On Spotify I search for all the 80’s Goth channels when I need to get out of my head and into a mopier time where I wore a *lot* more eyeliner than I do now…

Recently I’ve been trying out online crafting days with friends, which has gone enormously well. There’s a whole lot of lockdown still going on out there, and a lot of crafting supplies to use up. It’s just really nice to have that company, catching up with everyone and seeing what they’re working on in real time.

And now that it’s January? I feel like we have things we can hope for. There’s more vaccines out there. Spring is coming. (Not soon, not exactly. But stil! Spring!) I’ve been wallowing in seed catalogs, trying to imagine what the back yard could look like this year. I just had a birthday, and turned 50. Fifty!! It blows my mind that I’ve made it this far, especially after this last year. And today I watched the swearing in of Joe Biden and Kamela Harris, which made me so very, very happy. Better days are coming for us all. We just have to keep going on, finding our joys and cradling the things we love to us…

A drawing I did recently was of Arachne, one of the patron spirits of spinners, weavers and anyone who loves the fiber arts. She became a spider, after contesting with Athena at weaving, but has learned to appreciate small beautiful webs in quiet corners, away from chaos and unfairness and grief. Not a bad lesson for the rest of us, as least for a little while…

 

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One thing leads to another…

How did I get into embroidering things? How did I learn to spin yarn? How did I start knitting? Why do I have a big honking weaving loom all of a sudden? How did I get *here*?

So many creative people ask themselves that question. More of us now than ever, since the Pandemic has given so many of us more free time to explore activities we hadn’t had the time to consider before now. And there’s lots of us that have creative interests that slide into one another, or start out as one thing and surface as another. I feel like it’s the mark of a curious mind.  You toy with one art form, and think about how you could combine it with something else, or what to do to get an effect you want, and before you know it, you’re up to your eyebrows in yarn and embroidery floss and hot glue and gold foil.  One art form very easily bleeds into another, and sometimes you need those combinations to reach out to the vision in your head that demands to be a real thing.

Polymer clay and watch parts

For example, I started knitting as an extension of some beadwork I was doing, a very long time ago. I saw a knitted purse with beads strung onto the yarn, and loved it so much. But I didn’t know the first thing about knitting! So after a couple of library books and a quick tutorial or two from a coworker, I had begun to knit small, simple things. And it was better than fun, it was glorious! After exploring lots of beading and knitting possibilities, I tried stringing beads on a thread and knitting it along with a yarn. Which was fine, but lacked structure. What if…I made the yarn myself, spinning in the beads? So that means I’d have to learn to spin, shouldn’t I? Where’s that dowel I know I have, and that old CD I don’t listen to? I bet I could make myself a crude drop spindle with those…

And before I knew it? Boom! A spinning wheel in my living room that I learned to fix up from a book. Lots of possibilities for yarns I couldn’t afford or never knew existed before. New friendships with local fiber farmers, who were kind and generous to a new customer. An astounding flexibility when it came to knitting projects. Out of a yarn? I could make more, however I wanted! And knitting friends wanted some too. So…time for an Etsy shop and more fibers to play with. And, wasn’t that color of fleece just a little bit dull? And aren’t you craving a wonderful plum color? How about trying out dyeing fibers next?

Gory wool

What’s in that pot, Maus? What is it? Wool, you say? You sure? It looks…not good…

Dyeing fibers leads to playing with the concept of felting, if you agitate the dyewater too much.  And taking a knitted hat that’s waaaay too big and felting it made for a sturdy little hat with lots of structure for…embroidery? Why not? Hey, where’s that embroidery book you learned from when you were a kid? And it ends up being an excellent way to use up handspun odds and ends that aren’t enough to knit with but are too gorgeous to toss out. Also, weaving is good for things like that too. How about trying out that rigid-heddle loom for a big honking shawl?

And then…the Pandemic hit. And not only did I have my own art supplies to plow through,  but also supplies I inherited from my mother, who had loads of crafting stuff I hadn’t really explore before now, Woodburning tools, a really large and imposing hot glue gun, crochet hooks of every size and…whoa. Loads of embroidery floss. Now, where’s that old bamboo hoop I used to have?…

And that’s where I am these days, now that I’m home full-time. I just finished a pair of wristwarmers that I embroidered, and a felted hat, and some hooped embroideries with swearing in them, and I’m almost done with a green alpaca yarn that might need some beads. All of these things are complimentary to each other, and none can really crowd out my love of any of the others. And I’m hopeful that this winter more of us will have the opportunity to try out something they haven’t had a chance to do but always wanted to. Or reaquainting themselves with an art form, like meeting an old friend.  Winter’s good for exactly this sort of experimentation, and this yearning for a new way to express creativity is such a good way to work out problems and anxieties. It helps me stay away from my phone for a while, and stops the doomscrolling and the worrying for a little while…

What will you have by springtime that you didn’t have before, and never realized could be something you could do?

 

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The Gothmas Tree…

Welcome, my friends, to December!! Usually the time of year where we crowd together for warmth and cosyness, share gifts and food, and see who gets taken out first in the glorious game of Whammagheddon!  Sadly, this year is a little different. And it should be. The Covid numbers are so high in my state right now, the only sensible thing to do is to stay home, mask up and try like crazy not to get infected. And those of us who are trying to do exactly that are doing their best to make their homes a little more comforting and welcoming, to get us through this season. Here at Chez Cohen, we put up our tree a little earlier than usual, because we both love the twinkly lights and the fun of putting on or making ornaments. And, while I appreciate the wonder of a well-curated tree…my festive offerings are a little more,shall we say, whimsical. So, behold the Gothmas Tree!

Yippee ki-yi-yay…

Every year is a little bit different, but it’s always weird. There’s usually at least one skeleton hiding in the branches. There’s always at least one Cthuhlu ornament(and sometimes several), a couple of angry (but festive!) Daleks, and a wide variety of ornaments made by us or by loving friends. This year, I added green blinky eyeball lights to the purple and white light scheme we’re using this year, and as the month chugs along I’m planning on making more ornaments. (maybe with still photos from other films I consider “Christmas” movies, like “Prometheus” or “The Thing’) It definitely makes our living room a little more fun, and if you peek in the windows at our tree, you’ll find our tree peeking right back at you…

Making Gothmas, Making Gothmas, Lalalaaaa!

What are the other holiday plans? Good question. Mostly being very quiet, making as many interesting things as possible, and staying healthy. This moment in time feels a lot like the interlude in any zombie movie where people are holed up trying to distract themselves any way they can while the shuffling undead hordes roam around outside, howling and hungering. All I want for the holidays is for as many of us to be safe and well as possible. Anything else Santa brings me this year is frosting on the cake…

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Thanksgiving in solitary splendor…

Hello, my dears! I’m hoping like crazy that you’re home, and comfortable, and about to be very, very well fed.  This year it’s just going to be me, my sweet husband and the cats for Thanskgiving, just to keep everybody safe. It’s hard to not see friends and loved ones this year, but I wouldn’t be able to bear it if somebody I cared about got sick at some shindig at my place. So instead I’ll pester them on the phone and on Zoom, and share photos of cooking and mayhem, and decorate The Gothmas Tree.  We put it up a bit early, though it’s still very much in the early stages at the moment. (I suspect the Gothmas Tree will need it’s own post this weekend. There’s a lot of ground to cover there…)

I’m also planning to knock out some spinning and knitting this weekend, since I have a commission to play with and some really great fiber to spin up. There’s so much alpaca, people! So much! And now that my knee is recovered from whatever the heck I did to it, I can go back to the spinning wheels (carefully) and make some really fun natural and dyed yarns. Some of the shades of blue and purple I got from one shepherd are so perfectly beautiful, and I can’t wait to play with them all…

Also, I’ve been doing a few sketches for funzies, like the Jackalope I painted recently. It’s been hard to draw rabbits of any kind since Shamu the Bunny passed on; for the longest time I just didn’t have the heart to do it. But now it’s easier to embrace the memory of a sweet rabbit and bring his expressions to  other pieces of art.  And I’m also not sure why I wanted to draw a little bat hugging a tree ornament, but he really did turn out fairly swell…

Stay safe, my dear friends, and stay well, and I hope you’re planning on a tasty dinner and a thankful, quiet moment, and possibly a huge nap. I’m thinking about you all…

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Handspun Knitting Tips for New Knitters…

Hello, my dear friends! I hope you’re all staying safe and keeping out of harm’s way…So far we’re still keeping a quiet life here at the House of the Maus, and this winter’s shaping up to be more of the same.  But I’m thinking of fun quiet things to do in the future, which will keep me happily busy during the dark cold days.

Recently I’ve noticed an upswing of brand new knitters around me and my shop,, tiptoeing around shyly and asking questions about handspun yarns. So I thought I’d write some helpful advice for people that want to try out handspun but are afraid that their newfound skills aren’t good enough to rate them…

First off, handspun yarns tend to shine their best with simple stitches, especially the art yarns. So a really fun way to dress up some simple projects is with a handspun yarn. Try some for borders, for cuffs, for collars, for hat brims!

Also, it’s useful to have a handful of different sizes of knitting needles, so you can try out your yarns and see if you like the drape. . I often find that new knitters tend to knit somewhat tightly, but switching over to a larger needle size fixes the problem immediately. Don’t be afraid to play around and find what your hands like to knit with!

People also ask about how much yardage you need for various projects, which an be a tricky question. I find that it breaks down like this: Usually a skein of handspun bulky weight yarn, about 60 or 70 yards, is enough on it’s own for a hat. (Though you might need a little more for accents or tassels or pompoms. Pompoms eat up a *lot* of yardage.) It can also be enough for the body of a cowl, though I like my cowls extra long so that they double as a hood, which again means more yarn.  A skein of worsted weight yarn, about 80 to 100 yards, is enough for a hat or a skinny scarf on it’s own, but if you like really long scarves double the yardage, at least.  And both with bulky and worsted weight, one skein is enough for a set of mitts.  One skein of sport, dk or sock weight yarn (roughly 140 to 200 yards or more) is enough for a pair of mittens or socks, or a nice drapey mini-shawl.  Anything like a sweater, a poncho or a lap blanket is going to require at least 6 skeins of a yarn or more, depending on how big your project is. For the bigger stuff, talk to your handspinner, and they can buy their fleece in bulk so they have enough of what you want  for your project.

Some of this sounds pretty expensive, especially for a brand new knitter, huh? No worries. I collected most of my needles from thrift stores, or kind friends clearing out their stashes. There are excellent milled yarns out there that are a happy compliment to other yarns. (My favorites? Brown Sheep Company, and mohair yarns of all kinds.)   Other knitters also usually have a good stash of beginner’s yarn that they save for new people, as well as loaner books and patterns, so you don’t have to break the bank to try out something new.

So don’t be afraid of the handspun! For ages, handspun yarn was all there was, and everybody learned on it with whatever they happened to have. It’s okay to treat yourself to something pretty. And don’t be afraid to ask your spinners about what would work well for your projects. People like me are happy to help out and steer you to the right yarns for you…

Be safe, be well, and stay happily warm, everyone!

 

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My pastime is making midnight mushrooms…

I’m not exactly sure what I was expecting this autumn and winter to look like, way back in March when things started getting crazy in earnest. I know there was a big difference between what I was hoping for and what was actually going to happen. Sure enough, another lockdown seems to be barrelling it’s way towards us, and even if it isn’t formally announced, I think the smartest thing to do is to hunker down again.  Anything I can do to help keep people safe seems like a no-brainer to me, and I’m still frustrated and frightened by all those people out there who can’t even do the most basic stuff to keep other people healthy.  Not least because we’re such a vulnerable household right now. This is the time period I was the most nervous about when I was still working with the public, and right now I’m grateful beyond words that I can stay home over the winter. I realized it’s a lucky, priviledged position to be in, and while I feel some real guilt, I fight it with relief that my chances of giving somebody I care for Covid are so much less this way.

So I’ve been preparing with Matthew for a long, quiet winter.  It’s mostly the usual winter prep, with caulking and plastic over the older windows in the house, and leaves and burlap over the more sensitive plants outside. The pantry just got restocked; I have canned peaches for ages. The fresh stuff gets delivered to the house, and wiped down carefully. And apart from doctor’s appointments and whatnot, neither of us go out. Thanksgiving and Gothmas are being spent here at home, pestering our loved ones on the phone as much as possible.  I’ll miss my sweet people, but what else can we do?

For extra cosiness and a spot of cheerful light for the darkest part of the winter, I’ve been putting plants in the dining room, with a full-spectrum light for the really dark days, it’s turned into a pretty cosy place to eat or write or play with various crafting supplies.

Yeeeees, I put an Audrey in the dining room window.  It’s going to stay there all winter long!

I’ve also been busting out extra crafting supplies for projects over the winter. I stressed out my knee, so instead of using the spinning wheels for a bit, I thought I’d have some fun sculpting a few things, like toadstools…

*Not recommended for ingesting. Because you’ll break your teeth.*

So I feel like here, we’re ready to hide from the world again for a while. At least this time we don’t have the shock of the first lockdown, wondering what was going to happen. We know what’s going on a little better, and with the new vaccines coming up there is a light at the end of the tunnel, if we can get there. But first we have to get there, which means staying the hell out of the way. Please, everybody, please be careful,  I want to see you all again soon. You all deserve good health and safety, and I can’t wait to see you all online until we can have better days…

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The turning of the year…

This autumn has been and continues to be…interesting. In the classic, “May you live in interesting times” kind of way, for all of us. I’m writing this on Election day, where all of us here in the US are trying to hang onto the hope of something better, something sane. What we will actually get? There are so many possibilities, not all of them comforting. So what do you do?…

You hang on to all the good things you can. You eat Halloween candy, visit with friends, check in on far away loved ones. You do the needful things that keep the days going, no matter what else fills them. You vote. You wear a damn mask and wash your hands and try to stay safe. You try like crazy to sleep. You remember all the people who can’t be with you, and you miss them. You take your temperature and inventory any new blips in your health or the health of a loved one. You make crazy little pumpkins for the neighbor kids. You try not to let the news scare you more than it has to. You try to prepare for the worst, and try not to think about how bad that worst can actually be. You carry on…

In my case, I keep making things to help calm my worrier, anxiety filled brain. It helps to open the door to this soft, dark, quiet world full of odd embroideries and paintings, knitted things and yarn waiting to be touched. It gratifies me that so many of you want to share that world with me. We all want that comfort and love, that bit of unearthly oddity and funny things and practical goodness. And I find you all to be very good company in everything we’ve gone through so far. We all deserve medals. Big, shiny medals with sayings like, “Wore a Mask” or “Adulted My Guts Out” or “Gave a Crap About Others”.

Whatever comes, we’re still here together. Hang onto that when things get weird.  And I will too…

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Aggressively Cosy…

My dear friends, I gotta say, I’m grateful beyond words that I have so many requests for embroidered fun! Quite a few people have gone into the shop lately and messaged me with things like, ‘Hey, where are all those delicate swears you keep making? I don’t see any!” That’s because they seem to fly out the door as soon as I can make them! (If you *are* craving something you’ve seen me doing and don’t see it in the shop anymore, drop me a line! I’m happy to make something, just for you!)

Honestly, I need all of those flying F’s I can make. And apparently others do too.

It’s a comfort to me, besides all the swearing and stabbing. I am the luckiest duck that I can stay home right now and do this, After saying that, though, I will admit that there it’s still a bit spooky for me. My proper “working life” was so regimented, and I’m still adapting to this new life, even months later. I have a fair amount of anxiety anyway, so sailing in these uncharted waters is such a departure from the life of a uniformed Guardian of Culture. I still have dreams about going back to work at the museum. I miss the art, and my coworkers. But the payoffs are better than I expected. I’m up to my eyebrows in commissions, Redbubble sends me a check every now and then, and my sweet fellow’s health improves every day. I have a lot to be grateful for.

And all of you sweet people are part of this strange new life. I’m grateful beyond words for you. Because of you I get to experiment, and play with new art forms. And every day I learn a little bit more, and can bring that knowledge with me into some new idea that probably never would have happened otherwise.

Acorns? Acorns! Alas, this pretty thing already has a home. But I’m definitely making more!

Anyway, thank you. Thank you so much for your love, your anticipation of whatever strange idea I come up with, and your company. It’s always better to travel an unfamiliar road with friends…

 

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Delicate Swears…

So. These last few weeks I find my dear friends have a lot more swearing to do than the usual. There’s a lot of burn out, a lot of stress and fatigue and worry about an uncertain future. Personally I’ve been channeling a lot of my worries and stress through stabbing and swearing at things. Sometimes with pretty, pretty flowers, to soften the blow of all the cussing. and yet, the cussing remains…

Flying Fucks, catching the sweet breezes…
A tiny little thing, about the size of a dollar coin…

The demand has been huge, and gratifying. I’m now booked up for a while, happily stitching my unladylike profanities into whatever I can. I’ve even bought more supplies to keep the obscenity-train chugging right along.

That said, there are other things I’ve made too. There was definitely swearing involved for both these projects, but they weren’t nearly as overtly involved as the other pieces. A tiny teacup, a tiny glowing fairy. Some drawings that are going into the shop later. They’re also gratifying, in their own way…

A tiny teacup! With flowers!
A tiny fairy, in with my teacup collection.

These days, I think it’s important to vent. To get things out. To have some tiny, delicate thing that agrees with you about how you feel. Something pretty, and crass, and expressive in a way only the needle arts can express. I’m just grateful people want to share their cusses with me, and delight in my stabbing them into linen.

The next few months will be even more stressful for everybody. I suspect I’m going to have a lot of stitch-swearing to work on…